In the future lasers will: eat for us; cook for us; love for us. Currently, there is nothing you can do that a laser cannot do more efficiently.

Monday, May 14, 2007

Questions for Lasers.

If a laser moves throughout the forest, yet no one is around, does it make a sound?
Do lasers make sounds at all?

My theory is that once lasers take over, there will be no more music. There will be the simple, delicate sounds of lasers moving at different lengths and speeds.

These sounds will cause such great orgasms in each human's body that they will be forced to combust. Lasers will eradicate the human race without even trying.

1 comment:

T. J. Israel said...

Going to disagree. I think lasersong will probably be incredibly painful for the human body to endure, and will result in immediate, mass suicide by all those able to perform it. After the lasers realize what has happened, they will probably cease harmonizing long enough to create a more humane sound. This new and improved lasersong will be integral in not driving the remaining humans* to take their own lives.

*These remaining humans are those who could not perform suicide in the first case; people in constant vegetative states, etc. BTW: whatever their immobile condition may have been, the lasers will have cured them of it, so that they could be fully functioning exhibits within the lasers' "people zoo."